Not caring about sports yesterday I started leafing through the other sections of the newspaper. There I found this week’s sign that the Apocalypse is upon us…

Man sues Sweetgreen over salad-ordering app.

Yup. Lawsuit in the works because a guy can’t “customize his salad” via his salad-ordering phone app.

First. World. Problems.

To be fair, there’s a little more to it than this. You see (pardon the expression), the plaintiff is visually impaired and can’t make out the flashy signals on his phone too good.

And a lot of the fancier apps will talk to you if you ask them nicely.

“You can get to the salads,” he explains, “but you can’t customize.”

Can’t customize your nine-dollar eco-friendly salad.

This is why I usually just stick to the sports page.