For the first time in several years I’d actually seen a few of this year’s Academy Award for Best Picture Nominees. I’m either getting old or the Academy is getting loose with how they’re throwing around those nominations. One of the ones I hadn’t seen, actually, was this year’s winner: Green Book. A movie about a guy who drives a car and a guy who plays the piano (my two favorite things in the world) should be right up my alley, no?

Can I play both roles in the remake?