Having done this blog now for more than a year I realize I’m in a position simply to repeat posts in a never-ending 365-day cycle. For example, on November 25th I’m always going to mention Joe DiMaggio’s birthday, and on the night before Thanksgiving I’m always going to mention, well, the night before Thanksgiving. Hmm. Let me today at least add a new wrinkle.

For those of you reading this blog on some foreign planet, let me remind you that the night before Thanksgiving is the biggest party night of the year. I’m not exactly sure when this became the case, but it seems to be universally recognized now. Thanksgiving Eve is to be big everywhere, and if you’re in a podunk town (where people go out only one night a year), tonight will be off the hook.

I read an article recently headlined something like, “How Do You Know When You’re Too Old to Go Out on Thanksgiving Eve?” I appreciate the sentiment, but this kind of thinking misses the point entirely. Thanksgiving Eve is the one night a year so-called grownups can get away with staying out late and being ridiculous. “I think it’s time for somebody’s dad to go home” isn’t a remark for the unusually old and idiotic patron… it describes 70 percent of the people at the bar! This is amateur night. So beware.

And have at it, amateurs! ‘Cause this guy ain’t gettin’ anywhere near a bar on Thanksgiving Eve.