The most useless and overrated word in the English language is please.

It’s polite and all, sometimes pretty, and can fool some people some of the time, sure.

Some even call it magic.

I never do, and like honor to Falstaff, I simply call it a word.

“Please” never sways my opinion, nor changes my action.

Would you do this for me? is the exact same thing as Would you do this for me, please?

If I wanted to do it, and were capable of doing it, the addendum wouldn’t change anything.

If I didn’t want to do it, or were incapable of so doing… same thing.

Would you move this mountain for me?

No.

Would you move this mountain for me, please?

Same answer.

But I said please.

See Rule #1.

“Thank you” is many times a useful phrase, often coupled with the aforementioned please.

Please and thank you could not be more dissimilar.

“Thank you” is a pleasant thing to say after someone has produced for you a good or rendered you a service.

I say it often, because why wouldn’t I? And I appreciate hearing it, because it does in fact make me more likely to produce for you a good or render you a service in the future.

Regardless of whether accompanied by the word please.