Six a.m., day after Christmas

It was news several weeks ago when President Obama announced that December 26th would be a holiday for federal government employees. Oh, what a generous ol’ St. Nick, cooed the mainstream media.

It wasn’t the act itself (which was hardly without precedent) but the manner in which it was executed that should have received attention. What was required for the proclamation to be so was an executive order. An executive order, you say? Yes, an executive order.

An executive order is an act of an executive (here, the President) that manages operations within the government (in this case, the federal government) itself. For example, proclaiming a certain day to be a holiday. It is akin to a private business CEO declaring such a thing for his or her employees. It affects only the company itself, or in the President’s case, the federal government itself.

The bastardization of the executive order (sadly, this too is hardly without precedent), is one of the great misdoings of executive power in 20th and 21st century governance. Presidents now are in the habit of declaring “executive orders” whenever they feel it is inconvenient to rely on Congress (the branch of government tasked with legislating) to make laws. “Executive orders” today have shoehorned their way into having the full effect of law–see recent commotion and fuss over amnesty for illegal immigrants–though this was never the original intent (pardon the expression).

So enjoy your day of, federal government employees. At least it came about legitimately.

Christmas Eve

Ah, Christmas Eve, the only day we celebrate the fact that another holiday is almost here. (I consider Thanksgiving Eve a separate holiday from Thanksgiving and New Year’s Eve the real holiday as New Year’s Day is hardly anything at all.)

Christmas Eve means going to work but half-assing it all day. Christmas Eve is cookies and egg nog until you can’t see straight. It’s 24 hours of A Christmas Story, Vince Guaraldi, and that yule log channel at 3 a.m. And maybe catching a glimpse of you-know-who and his band of reindeer.

Yeah, Christmas Eve is my favorite almost holiday.

A free country, not a free world

Before last week nobody had ever heard of the movie The Interview. Now terrorist groups, world leaders, and every single person on Earth can’t stop talking about it. If this was all a publicity stunt… kudos.

Of course it’s disappointing to see that a work of art gets shelved for political reasons. It’s even more disappointing to say I get it. I get it. If the unthinkable happened (hardly unthinkable anymore), no amount of ticket and popcorn revenue could ever wipe Sony’s hands clean. It’s a business decision. I get it.

We say all the time that the United States of America “is a free country.” Of course it is. We can make fun of our leaders, political and otherwise, without (much) fear of retribution. Sadly this does not exist in most of the world today and hasn’t existed in most places at most times. This is a free country, not a free world.

So I’m more interested than ever in seeing The Interview, starring Seth Rogen and James Franco. Knowing nothing about this particular movie, I think those two make a pretty good team. Rogen, especially, is one of the funniest acts in Hollywood.

I’ve seen recently two movies with a similar premise: thirtysomething parents still trying to be hip. Seth Rogen’s Neighbors is hilariously good, I think out-Superbad-ing even Superbad. But Sex Tape, with Jason Segel and Cameron Diaz? Resting on their laurels. Point is: Rogen still brings it and I can’t wait to see his latest.

Government work not what it used to be?

In his “Two for the Road” closing segment of yesterday’s program, radio host Colin Cowherd cited a recent survey suggesting that young people (“Millenials”) are no longer interested in government work. Because fewer young’uns are working in government these days, he reasoned, it obviously has lost its appeal. The government, that vaunted employer of past generations, can’t compete in a world of tech companies and other “hip” operations.

Ha!

Believe it, Colin, every single person on Earth wants the comfort and security (financial and otherwise) of a government job. The reason young people aren’t getting into the mix is that today’s older generation, as opposed to previous older generations who conveniently died off in their fifties and sixties, refuses to give up those plum jobs in government!

The week before Christmas

Forget the night before Christmas. That is so 19th century. This is 2014, and in our supersized world we need a full seven days of nights before Christmas to get it done.

The week before Christmas is the week everyone else lives the way I like to live all the time: a flurry of social and economic activity that makes everything else seem dull by comparison. Good luck, friends, and hang on to those sled reins tight!

Done with football

Well, at least I got to see my favorite Redskins quarterback in action yesterday. Though the circumstances and result of RG3’s return weren’t exactly as I would have hoped, I suppose it could be worse…

we could have Johnny Manziel.

It’s all too late, though, and I’ve given up on football for the season. I’ve jumped on the Wizards bandwagon again, happy to say much earlier than I did last year. So okay, Wizards, go ahead and get my hopes up. I’m all in.

Happy Birthday, FS!

fs

 

A certain hero of mine turns 99 today, and although Frank Sinatra hasn’t sung a note in nearly two decades, his voice remains as constant in the rhythm of American life as it did for his 60 years in show business.

It is trite to say, of course, “there will never be another Frank Sinatra.” Cliche or not, there won’t be. The world is simply too different now, the way stars are made and music is produced. But his music lives on, and the imitators (good and poor) keep trying. I should know. I’m one of those imitators.

I’ve written many words about Frank Sinatra over the past 20 years, some published, some not. I don’t think I’m going to add anything particularly brilliant today. He was and still is one of the most written about Americans in history. I’ve got two dozen of his biographies on my shelf, and there are probably 100 more I haven’t read. These writers are far more poetic than I, and I recommend them all. Was he a perfect role model? Of course not, but few people we know so well are. He was a human being. A human being like all of us, but blessed with so much talent and initiative, and he shared it with all of us. Those who knew him best echo this sentiment in his private life as well.

Happy Birthday, Mr. Sinatra! Ninety-nine looks good on you.

Christmas specials more special this year

Every December I make it a point to watch all of the “classic” Christmas specials, either live on TV, on one of my DVDs, or, most likely, an old VHS tape I made copied for myself in 1997. This year has been especially satisfying for me, getting to watch these specials for the first time with my son.

My favorite Christmas special, of course, is A Charlie Brown Christmas. Aired for the first time on December 9, 1965, it’s sort of the granddaddy of all TV specials, Christmas or otherwise.

I think few people realize that Charlie Brown was actually preceded by the less-heralded Rudolph the Red-Nosed ReindeerRudolph first aired 50 years ago this week, on December 6, 1964.

I think Rudolph is underrated, especially the music. Everyone knows the main theme, but there are at least a half dozen other classic holiday tunes on that soundtrack.

And now my son understands when we get in the car and I announce: First stop… the Island of Misfit Toys!

CFP solves all controversy… obviously

Well, this was inevitable. The system that was going to solve all end-of-year controversy in college football ended up doing nothing but stirring up more controversy and inflaming tempers and egos all over the country. Let me be the first to say told ya so.

The problem with every system to determine a champion in a sport with so many teams and so short a season (so not every team plays one another) is that it must be determined before the start of the season. It would be easy to decide, at the completion of the regular season, who is “worthy” enough to compete for a title. Sometimes there’s already a clear-cut champion. Sometimes there are two teams standing above the rest. Sometimes there are three, sometimes there are seven. Point is, you don’t know until the season is over. But with so much revenue on the line, playoff schedules and their accompanying TV slots must be decided months ahead of time, and you’re left trying to squeeze a square Big 12 team into a round CFP hole. Moral of the story is, it’s not two teams versus four teams, or human picks versus computer picks, but TV advertising and game revenue. In other words, follow the money.

In more pleasant news, I thought The Simpsons really brought it last night. Not exactly old-school Simpsons, just a really good episode. Kudos. 

But the Redskins… sheesh! Zero points? Cousins could have done that!

Thinking back a few decades

Twenty years ago this weekend I was involved in something called “Drug Quiz Show,” a Jeopardy!­-like event for middle school students to display their knowledge of various illegal substances. I’ve thought about that experience a lot, actually, one because one of my teammates from that day is no longer with us, and two, by how ridiculous trying to memorize facts about marijuana and PCP would be in 2014. The Internet has literally thousands of times more information at the click of a mouse or touch of a phone, to say nothing of the casual knowledge held by today’s teen. And marijuana? Seriously? It’s accepted to the point of being quasi-legal in much of the country today, an arrangement unthinkable in the “just say no” culture in which I grew up just a few years ago. Well, maybe a decade or two.

Speaking of decades, tonight marks another anniversary of sorts. I’ve been doing this one for three decades now. With tomorrow being the Feast of St. Nicholas (ol’ St. Nick died on this day in the year 343), tonight’s the night one is supposed to leave out his or her shoes to be filled by a generous benefactor. For the first time in 30 years I’m on the other side of this one, having now a child of my own. (He has no idea who St. Nicholas is or what shoes are either, but the sentiment is there and the tradition has begun.)

These childhood recollections of mine are no doubt excluding important items from entering my memory, but I like them more than the usefulness of any facts I might encounter.