We just can’t stop talking about it

I’m pretty sure I’m the only commentator left in America who has not weighed in on “Deflate-gate.” Let me amend that.

By now we have all heard the story—under-inflated footballs used in the AFC Championship Game seemingly with the knowledge of the home team—and speculated about which Patriots knew what and who told who to lie about it. Guh. At least we stopped talking about domestic violence and child abuse for a few minutes. Anyone know there’s a game on Sunday?

The real problem is that this is exactly what the Super Bowl is. People who don’t care about football 364 days a year jumping in for one day to watch singers, dancers, commercials, wardrobe malfunctions, and sixth grade gossip.

To the game, I do think the Patriots will emerge victorious, regardless of what size balls are used. Too bad their victory’s already tainted. And they’re really in a no-win situation here: win and you’re still a cheater; lose and you obviously got here only by cheating.

Pitchers and catchers report in 21 days.

Still smiling after yesterday

You’ve got to love a day in which two of the four  major professional sports have their all-star games, one of which ended 17-12 (hint: it wasn’t football). Earlier in the day basketball coaching god Mike Krzyzewski won his 1000th career game (he’s the first to do so), and on the later side my hometown Wizards came from behind to actually defeat a Western conference foe. Sports will keep you smiling through any blizzard.

Saturday schedule for an almost adult champion

Saturday, January 24, 2015.

9:30 a.m. Wake-up

10 a.m. Family storytime at public library

12 p.m. Kentucky vs. South Carolina

2:30 p.m. Georgetown vs. Marquette

5 p.m. Watch The Interview. Toast America.

7:30 p.m. NHL skills contest

10 p.m. Go outside and pretend to skate around like NHL all-star

10:30 p.m. Nurse hockey injury with hot chocolate and Wizards game

12:30 a.m. Bedtime. Nothing left to prove. #adulthood

 

 

State of the Union, Shmate of the Union

Like the weatherman who tells you what you can plainly see is happening outside, President Obama’s State of the Union speech last night didn’t really tell me anything I didn’t already know. He’s a good-looking ideologue who speaks in pleasant-sounding platitudes. Yeah, I knew that.

Thankfully over the years fewer and fewer Americans have been paying attention to State of the Union speeches. Perhaps because they find them worthless or perhaps because there are just too many other things on TV, I’m pretty sure more Americans care about the faux government shown on Parks and Recreation that the real one that followed it on NBC last night.

Which reminds me, nobody post a comment about Parks and Recthat one I still want to watch later.

CFP final finally here

It’s here.

This is the moment we’ve been waiting for since August. Yes, August. This college football season started in August. Has it felt too long? Not a chance.

And tonight is the grand finale, featuring two teams I really didn’t think would be here. I guess I should have expected Oregon, who has now reached the elite of college football programs, though has yet to win a national title.

Let that change tonight. Go, Ducks!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m four hours late on the pregame show.

Archer Season Six premiere

Last night proved that even a lackluster episode of Archer is going to be enough to get me through a stupidly-cold winter. The show’s not for everyone, but if you haven’t seen it yet do yourself a favor and just try it once. Proof that good television still exists in the world.

Quartet makes Baseball HOF

Three pitchers and one, well, everything, will be enshrined in Cooperstown this summer at baseball’s Hall of Fame ceremonies, the first time in sixty years as many as four players will be inducted. Unlike in past years, when baseball’s writers sent long-since-retired players, managers, and executives to the hall, the Class of 2015 includes four guys who could probably still lace ’em up. Seriously, you think you could get a hit of Randy Johnson today?

Johnson, a star in both leagues and a notorious Yankee killer, led the field garnering one of the highest vote totals of all time. He’s followed by fellow pitchers Pedro Martinez and John Smoltz, and catcher-come-second baseman-come-outfielder Craig Biggio.

Four players, one asks? Is the selection committee getting soft? I don’t think so. Cooperstown is still the toughest election in sports. And yeah, it’s a popularity contest, as most non-scientific elections are. If it were some formula based on stats or other metrics we could have a computer do it. But like the game itself, it’s played by human beings.  There are always political consideration. So John Smoltz wasn’t the best pitcher of his era. He’s a beloved figure. And he’s now part of the media that adored him so. Biggio? Sure, he was a stat compiler. But one of the best. And he did it for one team for his whole career, and apparently never touched the juice. That’s why he’s in and Bagwell isn’t. Simple as that. I’m happy to see steriod-tinged players are still getting no love in Cooperstown.

And how do I feel about people barely older than myself being bestowed with such lifetime achievements? I guess I’m okay with that too.